I must have had a lobotomy!

I was slammed all day. Seriously, yes I am a stay at home mom, but that makes me super busy. Between a field trip, doctors appointment and working on the Cases for Cheer, Inc., I didn't even sit down all day (OK other than my drive time, but you so get my point right?). I kept thinking, "I need to go grocery shopping but I can do that when the kids get out of school." Say What!?! I must have had a lobotomy!

The girls are 7 and 10, how hard can it be? Oh how I wish I could take that shopping trip back! Between hopscotching on the different color floor tiles, and running into a wheel chair bound person, I thought I was going to die.

Isn't it funny how when you know things are going to be a little difficult, you try to prep the kids? "Okay girl's this is a quick trip OK, so let's just stay close and tight and we will be in and out real quick and get home." Well that is like putting bait for a shark, like letting the enemy see the map to your location, like... well... you get the point.

"Ohhh!!!" they think in their little minds.... "Ohhh... Mom is a bit frazzled, let's see if we can find that loose thread and unravel her!" Oh unravel they did!!! We walk in, and head towards the produce, hopscotching mind you, despite the look that I thought could kill (again, it's like showing the dealer my cards! Ugh!) but really just inspires them. The first collision happens, the 7 year old, nearly ends up in the lap of a wheel chair bound lady, who's look by the way, really can kill. I apologize profusely, feign a smile, and grab Emma's arm wishing I could tell her what I was really thinking, but just smile as people sneak peeks from the corners of their eyes.

The second collision comes as she decides to stop right in front of my and my view is blocked by Bean's car seat perched and locked on the cart! (side note: who thought of this design? How tall do they think women are anyway, I mean, yes I would love to be 5'10 with long legs, but at 5'6 I cannot see over the seat without my stilts!) So Emma stops, I rear end her at a very slow speed, however, the drama has now commenced... Wailing! Wailing mind you!

"Oh my gosh Emma!!! Did I hit your head?" I ask.... "Noooooo" she wails. "Your back?" I ask looking her over feverishly as the wailing, continues at the loudest decibel level I think I have heard! "A little, but you didn't even see me mom, and I really wanted those cookies!" "What?" I ask feigning yet another smile as I begin feeling the blood rise to my face and anger boil as I realize this isn't because I hit her... "I really wanted those cookies MOM!". "So", I say, smile now plastered on my face to cover the "Hulk" I feel taking over my body since I am pretty sure my clothes are going to shred and my green muscles are now bulging! "So... you mean you are wailing for all the people in 3 counties to hear because I said no cookies?" "Well I really wanted them MOM!"

What was I thinking? Shopping with three kids? Seriously? I quick turned towards the register leaving Emma in my wake. I checked out, silently... Apparently silently is a better clue to my mood than my killer look! Head hung she trudges to the car. I thank the bagger for helping me to my car, giving me time to cool off, sparing me a prison sentence. On the way home, I begin thinking... Is 330 too early for a martini?