American Idol: Shower Edition Here I come

I always knew was supposed to be a famous celebrity singer. I just have always known that. It is a part of me... well maybe a part of my imagination. However, that dream was dashed this morning, as I belted out my rendition of Taylor Swift's "Love Story" in the shower. I was great, let me tell you. I had all the lines, I wavered my voice, it was shower stellar! That is until Elise comes in and asks what all the yelling is about!

First of all, let's tackle the obvious, as a mother I have lost almost all privacy. The girls think nothing of walking in while I shower (or worse am using the restroom!) and just talking up a conversation, while I rinse my body and hair. Most days I don't care, but some days, (except for the restroom incidents on those I always care) I am like sheesh, doesn't a mom get a moment's peace? What the heck. Some days I don't feel like being watched, some days I just want to have that shower as my peaceful start to the day. Unfortunately the girls, just do not understand that, no matter how many times I tell them!!! I hate locking doors because if there was an emergency with how our room is set up, I would never hear them knocking. Anyway, I guess Mommy in their minds is 100% available all the time. I think I need to make a new rule!!!

OK, back to the questionable vocals! So hear I am, pretty sure that if a spotter was in my bathroom at that moment I would be offered a recording contract. Of course they would have to make me over and get me a trainer before they could sell me to the public, oh and I would have to have Bean first, but I would be famous! LOL Just when I am beaming with pride at myself, Elise comes in, hands over her ears, confused look on her face, asking, "What is all the yelling about? It is only 8am and no one is here!" I tell her I wasn't yelling, I was singing. She removes her hands from her ears, places them on her middle, and begins to laugh so hard, tears are coming down her face!

I feel my face redden, I forget I am naked and not quite dry, I point at the door angrily, she tries to apologize between the chuckles, "Out!" I yell! "Out!" "If you want to know what the yelling is about now? I would be more than happy to tell you!!!" She runs out. My dreams and pride are dashed, apparently my dreams of being discovered, are just dreams, and I, Calista, am not destined for a great singing career, but! but! I am destined to continue my shower serenades, because I like how I sing! But maybe I will spare the world, and not take up karaoke?

So Mom, When did you and Dad, you know Do it?

Yes that is one of the questions my 9 year old daughter Elise asked me following us telling the girls that we were going to have a new baby. I had to laugh, I knew the question was coming because I had read to Elise, the Body Book; It's a God Thing, in December. It is a christian view point book written in today's language and a girls point of view. It is written to tell them about the changes in their life with puberty, peer pressure, drugs, etc. It is an awesome book, but since I had read it to her she has asked about sex and what it is.

I told her that the Bible says for us to wait until we are married. By doing so we do not have many of the worldly worries such as teen pregnancy, STDs and the like. Now before I get a million comments (yeah right I am lucky to get one!) let me tell you. I believe this is what God prescribes for a reason, however, I am not oblivious to the ways of the world, which is why I want to explain to her the body processes and challenges of sex prior to marriage. My head is not in the sand. I let her ask questions, and I answered them . I told her that boys have different parts than her. She said she knew (which I had hoped so! LOL). Then she asks "Do those parts connect with our parts?" I tell her yes. She proceeds to ask, "Bare?!" I tell her yes, which is followed by the predictable "Ewwwwww!!!! Gross!!!!!". So then I tell her that yes right now it seems gross, but someday it won't, and when that time occurs we need to talk again. She agrees.

Now we had that talk, in December of last year, so when we told Emma and Elise, I knew some questions were bound to arise. The first responses were met with glee and Squeals. Elise said "I have always wanted us to have a baby type thingy!" and Emma asked "When do we get it?". That made me laugh like Bean was going to come via UPS overnight or something! I was quite happy with their responses because Emma has always been very devoted to being the baby of the family and anytime a conversation arose about having another, she was very staunch in her answer "NO! I am the BABY!" So I was quite happy with her change in attitude so now we don't have to nanny cam her! LOL

It wasn't until this morning when Elise went on to ask, "So mom, when did you and dad, you know do it?" I obviously didn't tell her. I told her mommy and daddy relations are private. I was however that we had had the prior talk to all of this. I am also glad that she feels she can ask me questions, though as the parent, I always reserve the right to not answer. I think it is important that we do not bury our heads in the sand as parents like generations past. I believe that we have the responsibility to instill in our children the beliefs that we hold dear. When it comes down to it, children will make their own decisions, but we as parents have done our job if we have given them the tools, and the belief systems that we believe are best. That is the best we can do.

So I encourage all of you to take this subject head on. Do not let society tell your children what to believe, you need to do it, if you haven't already. It is a hard topic, but keeping the lines of communication open on the tough subjects is what will allow our children to make good decisions and get help when they have made bad ones. I will always be Emma and Elise's mother, not their friend, but I still want to be there for them with arms wide open. Here is the link to the book I read to Elise, it is for girls, but there are others for boys. Check it out, I am sure you can find it on many sites, and I encourage you as usual to shop for the best deal! Good Luck!

http://www.bookschristian.com/se/product/books/Nancy_N_Rue/The_Body_Book/125037/The_Body_Book_Paperback.html

12 weeks and Two Days

I know I am not the most patient of people. Today I am 12 weeks and 2 days pregnant. I am still feeling ill, and I am still feeling tired. Despite the fact that I am in my second trimester by only two days now, I am clinging to the fact that all websites and books say I should be feeling better in my second trimester!!!! All I can think of is when? I am a good 48 hours in and should be feeling better right?

Ok... maybe it is the pregnancy insanity talking, or maybe I am channeling Bean's thoughts because Bean wants me to get the heck up off the couch and do something... I don't know. What I do know is my next scheduled Ultrasound is April 2nd. Ugh! Too far away! How can we tell Elise and Emma that we are going to have another Bean now that we are 12 weeks, without having some sense that all is still well on the Uterine Front? So I call one of my great friends, who happens to be an Obstetrician (yay me!). She says come on in!!! So today at 12 weeks and 2 days Bean and I are going to have another look see!!! Should all be well (and I keep telling myself it is) I will be posting these U/S pics finally as the Bean will be out of the bag! Not literally of course! Now that the girls will be informed I will finally let me public see the first baby pics! Of course US weekly isn't offering to pay millions for the first glimpse, and baby Jolie-Pitt, Bean isn't but that is ok, My public awaits!!! LOL

Two Be A Mom is getting noticed!

Thank you to all my readers who are patient with me during my tiredness and days off from posting! I never remember being this tired with my other two pregnancies, which is why I believe wholeheartedly in the theory of Pregnancy Brain. After all if we remembered how hard it was, we would only have one child!

Thank you for passing along my blog address and adding to my "hit list"! My blog is getting noticed and I may soon have some product reviews and money saving coupon buttons that will be added! I want to reassure you, that this is a blog for moms by a mom. I will never post a recommendation or coupon for a product unless I have personally tried it and truly believe in it or enjoy it myself. All of the links I currently post are ones that I use and enjoy.

Promises of Spring Leave Me With Cold Toes

Here in Sunny California, it can look warmer than it is! I keep waiting for that damned groundhog that keeps predicting 6 more weeks of winter to finally kick it so we can try to stack our bets with a summer loving groundhog!

For the last few days I keep hearing it will be in the high 60's... **cough** Where? I ask? I hear it will be warm so I don my capri's and flip flops only to have hypothermia set in once I go out side and head to the office. Where are these near 70 degree days? Well not in Northern California?

Where do these weather people go to school? How can they decide whether the day will bring 68 or 63 degrees? Whether that slight breeze will create a drop in temperature to where my leg hair grows a mile a minute forcing me to shave two days in a row? I just don't get it!

Don't get me wrong! They have a fabulous job. I mean what other profession can you think of that guessing and getting it wrong is completely ok? I want that job. I want the job where I just flick the arrow and where it lands is where I predict! Meanwhile I am now bringing slippers to the office, since you cannot see my feet under my desk and still maintaining my cute spring fashions. Because if I wear it! It will come!!!

Ob Appointment, and my latest meeting with the Internal Ultrasound Wand

So yesterday I go into my appointment, it is raining and cold here in not so sunny California, but I am clad in capri's and flip flops so as not to repeat the weigh in of the last appointment where I was in sweats, a sweatshirt and uggs! I swear it all weighed 20 extra pounds, but it could just be me. Freezing I step on the scale, and do not see all 20 pounds shed off, ugh! but at least 3 are gone! Freezing for 3 freaking pounds... not a great plan.

We go back and she does my blood pressure, which is uber low, yay me!!!! I thought the fact that I was sweating bullets might have raised it but apparently not! Now feeling stronger and more confident by this news we move on to the exam room. Out comes the speculum a.k.a. "The Duck". Nooooo!!!! Then in comes the machine with the two foot long internal Ultrasound wand, and grab my chest thinking of the close call with the punctured lung at the last appointment!

I talked to the Nurse Practitioner who is in charge of this appointment, and tell her that I do not want the duck. She looks at me quizzically (oh come on! like they haven't heard it referred to as that before!) Now I feel the bullets of sweat coming back. I explain that I have pelvic separation (which is ohhhhh so painful and will most likely lead to bed rest, which for the rest of you may mean hourly Calista Posts, because what else will I be able to do?) "Ok, Ok," She says, I just was going to test for Chlamydia and the G virus (can't think of the name). I am like "what?" She says we do it for all pregnancies. I explain that I do not need the test as Colin and I have been together since I was 16, we work for the family business with my parents, all day, together... ohhh what will retirement lead to??? So really he has no opportunity to cause any of this to happen. She tells me some women are surprised! Ugh! She would really feel better if I did it, and it is after all of this, she tells me they have a pee in a cup test for it! Hello??? Why wouldn't they do that anyway???? Why invade occupied territory for a swab, why, tell me why, they didn't do that with the last battery of tests I had to do, sheesh! So I relent, and tell her if it will make her feel better, fine I will pee in a cup (basically, I had to go so bad at that point, it was worth it just to be able to go!!!!)

First she says we should do the ultrasound. So she tries abdominally, but nothing... panic is rising, then she says, well you are not thin, so we will go internal! I am not thin? Really because then I must have fun house mirrors because I swore I was a Giselle Bundchen beauty! Hello? I think they just like to poke and prod and since she was deprived of the swab on comes the two foot wand. I ask her to be gentle that my lungs have a way of jumping out at sticks, (not really but i was trying to get plain Jane to laugh... to no avail, I must add.)

All of a sudden the baby bubble jumps on the screen, the prodding of said two foot wand, has awoken bean, and it begins to dance and swim around. I see the head (the really big looking nose, please no Mr. Potato Head babies!!), the two arms, two legs. I see the spine, and the umbilical cord. The beauty of a miracle from God. I feel peace, then a it looks into the picture if I didn't know better, I would swear it was flipping it off for waking it up! I tell the nurse, "Wow it looks pretty developed for 9 weeks!" She does the measurements, and sees I am at 10 weeks 4 days! Only 10 days until the 12 week first trimester, deep breaths mark! Woo Hoo!!! What an excellent sign!!!

So I left the office feeling pretty good about Bean. Feeling more confident that this little miracle will be coming home with me this September, to nuzzle and coo, scream and poo. I would post pics, but we still haven't told Elise or Emma or the rest of the fam (other than parents) so to honor all of them, I will wait until I am able to share it with all of them. Thanks for listening!!!

My dear Blogger Friend, was so kind as to nominate me for this very prestigious award! It is for Bloggers by bloggers and the winner has the obligations to list 7 things that they enjoy as well as 7 blogs they enjoy to read, I only read 5 so that is what I am passing on. I received this award from Mary K Brennan who pens (or types as the case shall be) "The Adventures of Mommy Maestro" check out her awesome and creative blog to start your day off right http://marykbrennan.blogspot.com/

I feel honored to be acknowledged by a fellow blogger, and Mary has been wonderful as her blog has been a great inspiration! I can rely on her for the oh so exciting comment posting, so that I know that someone out there really reads this!!!

On to my 7 things I love, other than my faith and family as those would take up all 7!

1. Kettle One Up Extra Chilled Extra Olive Martini's (Yes prior to Bean, but yet again following Bean)

2. Reading a good book by a great author, such as Jen Lancaster (Blog listed below, only check out if you can laugh your tookas off!)

3. Pedicures without the paraffin wax (can you say HOT!)

4. Facebook, can't help it! I love it! Even if all the people I cannot remember from high school add me as their friend (no I wasn't popular, more like invisible, or so I thought!)

5. Good family Photographs. (Check out Bella Mena Below!)

6. Bunco... Mom's night out with wine (again prior to Bean), dice and chocolate, really what could be better?

7. Wednesday night date night with Collin!!! I love me some time with my man!!! And not having to cut someone's dinner up is always a plus!

5 Blogs I love to read and Pass the Award onto are (except for Mary's http://marykbrennan.blogspot.com/ since she is my beloved referrer!):

1. Jennsylvania www.jennsylvania.com be prepared, too hilarious!

2. The Puppies Cooley http://www.puppiescooley.blogspot.com/ Just when you think Dogs can't talk!

3. Beautiful Photography http://www.bellamena.blogspot.com/ Sindy is WONDERFUL

4. Hungry Girl ok, it isn't a blog but go with it: http://hungry-girl.com/

5. http://irishembi.blogspot.com/ Very funny!

Pass on the Honors everyone!!! And have a Wonderful Day!!!

Frugal Tip of the Day Slow Down or Speed Up Your DSL

Most of us really don't notice if we have 1 or 10 mps(or whatever the speed thing is) for our DSL. We had one which is supposed to be slower than 10, but when for some reason or service ran a promotion I actually saved $20 a month by going to the higher speed! I called recently because I was on the money saving train, and if I lowered my speed, I would actually have to pay more than I am paying now! Crazy!!!

So call your Internet service provider, and the other providers in your area, see what they are charging for different speeds, you may end up changing! I know the hassle of email if you change! That is why I no longer use my Internet Service Providers email account. Check out Yahoo or GMail, for a free email account, that you will never have to switch despite changing providers!!! I did it about 3 years ago, and I am thrilled, I now feel free to change as I see fit, because there is no longer the irritation of having to email out each time, that we have changed!

OB/Gyno Visit Equals Tummy Trouble and Humiliation!

So today I am going in for my second "viability scan". Isn't that just a lovely and reassuring term? I mean seriously, I feel like I am walking the plank and I may get lucky. Shouldn't it be the other way around? Shouldn't it be we are going to see your baby today!!! Of course there is always the knowledge that something can be wrong but it isn't in the freaking forefront, it is merely in the background, while joy is allowed to reign until proven otherwise.

I am scared to death of the two foot internal Ultrasound wand coming back into my life, last time I swear I narrowly escaped a punctured lung. I am hoping, praying that between beans supposed size, and my fat not getting in the way, that they can do the standard belly wand. Note to self: Do not go to the bathroom before! Which is really a double edged sword, because if you go, they cannot see bean as well, and if you don't go you feel like with all the pushing you will spew your bladder all over the place. Sorry for the uncouthness but it is a worry, and it seems like when you are pregnant, all bodily functions are up for discussion! I don't know why!

Then there is the pee test you are supposed to take each time you go in. The one where they give you the smallest bottle and you are supposed to somehow aim and give them a sample so they can test it for glucose or whatever with those keto strips. How lovely is it to see your nurse each time and hand her your cup of pee! It is humiliating! Seriously! They already did the test why retake it every time? Honestly I think they see a thick girl and say, hmm... she must have high cholesterol and be diabetic. For the record. I am neither of those!

I am also worried that they are going to want to use the "duck" and do the pap smear and all of that. Ugh! I hate that! I hate someone at that end of me, if makes me nervous, and I will be honest I constantly worry that I will toot! I know! I know! You didnt need to know that! But I have to tell someone, and I really do not want Colin going off to work thinking about his wife tooting at the gyno office!!! I never have, I swear, because I would totally tell you, but why is it a worry? I swear I am the only one with these irrational fears!

It seems until last night when it was all racing back to me, that I had forgotten how one loses what seems to be all privacy, all rights of hiding bodily functions. I guess your right to privacy ends with the fertilization of your eggs! Ugh!!!!! Wish me luck, as I pick out the perfect outfit, the whitest socks, and try to aim into that dreaded cup!

Frugal Tip of the Day Save on Household Items!

I think we have all heard about the millionaire who despite his fortune, saved the remnants of his soap bars and would put them together to reuse when the ball got big enough. My idea is similar, except far less tedious and gross. It came to me as I helped my dear Emma wash her hair. She likes to do it all herself. So I watched as she poured entirely too much shampoo for that little head of hers. All I could think of is what a waste! I told her she really doesn't need more than a quarter sized dollop for her head, and at most two of those dollops, definitely not two cup fulls.

So after her shower I head to the Laundry room, where I promptly fill up the detergent to the top line. Immediately I think about Emma and her shampoo. Why do I feel the need to fill it to the top? So I poured only 2/3 in about the 2nd line worth. Then off to the dishes where I thought about it before I filled both cups to the brim of Dishwasher detergent. Why after all are there two cups?

Soon I am sure there is a conspiracy amongst the manufacturers and the detergent companies!!! It is one to get us to over use these products and waste money! Now I don't even fill the one cup to the brim, and guess what? I still have shiny food free dishes! The same with the clothes detergent, I only go to line 2 really saving 1/3 of the detergent I would use per wash. Also with body wash and shampoos. I am not talking about getting half clean, but really using only what we need to get ourselves and our homes clean. I noticed that my laundry soap has lasted longer and all of our items like that. Really using more doesn't mean more clean, it means more money and cleaners down the drown. Just a thought!

Frugal Tip of the Day Check out Interest Rates

Interest rates can make or break your finances. If you notice most credit cards are sky high, and most savings accounts are gutter low. But there are deals out there!!! For instance, did you know you can call your credit card company and negotiate a lower rate if you have a balance and even if you don't? Call them! If they won't help you out, check into the 0% interest cards that allow balance transfers, a lot of them are willing to give you 6 months of no interest, and low if any interest on balance transfers!

Bank Accounts: I know we are all trying to be extremely cautious with the money we do have. However, there are safe ways to make more money in different interest baring accounts. You may want to check them out. Sometimes in lieu of a Certificate of Deposit or CD which you pay penalties to withdraw early are a good idea. However if you have enough money (most banks are about $5K minimum) you can look into Money Market Savings and Money Market Checking accounts. These accounts do have the higher minimum but yield a higher percent interest, plus you can access your funds. Keep in mind that if you do go below the minimum that the interest benefits will be lost, however there is no penalty in most cases and that is important.

Finally check out some institutions like Franklin Templeton which offer funds which are also non-taxable so really that increases the benefit quite a bit since you will not have to pay taxes on the interest you earn from that account!

Miss Hannigan Moment

Do you remember Miss Hannigan from the 1982 movie Annie? Miss Hannigan (Played by Carol Burnett) was the mistress of the orphanage that Annie lived in during the Great Depression. She was mean, she was drunk, but somehow her character was able to gain the audience's sympathy.

Well I wasn't drunk, and my kids lives are not like that of an Orphanage, but darn it, I wanted nothing better than to feed them Hot Mush, no make that Cold Mush today! I came downstairs, and I nearly jumped out of my skin! All of a sudden I remembered Miss Hannigan's coined phrase, "KILL!!! KILL!!!" Of course she would never harm the children, but it certainly got her frustration across to them.

When I walked into the kitchen and saw the marker and pencil box splayed across the kitchen table with pencil shavings on the table and floor, then looked into the food prep area to see that bread crumbs covered the counter and floor, along with the smell of burnt cheese from a microwave version of a grilled cheese, I wanted so badly to scream! My neck and shoulders burned with tension and irritation. I am not sure which I was more of, tense or irritated. Mind you the girls had only come down stairs 20 minutes before me, so what the heck happened???

I asked Elise and Emma, if they saw anything wrong, and of course the deer caught in the headlights look and a "no" shake of the head, said they did. Their curious looks made me check my own ears to see if steam had in fact began escaping them. Once I was satisfied that steam was not escaping through my head, I began my check list of what was wrong. The most irritating part is, having to say it when you know that they know!!! What were my comments met with? Moans, groans, and the you're a mean old Mommy look!

I bit my tongue and refrained from the "Kill, Kill" comment, and I did not feed them mush hot or cold (partly because I am not entirely sure what it is), they got their standard waffles and eggs from their Mean old Mommy huh? Seriously though, am I completely wrong in thinking that they have a place and time for their things, and that their mess should not take over the house? I get the chills like when watching Alfred Hitchcock's "The Birds" when I am surrounded by mess and disorder. I am usually able to keep in the horror scream, but today was a close call.

What part of sharpen your pencils over the garbage can is too hard? Or put the markers and pencils away when they are not being used? And how many times, must I tell you that when you microwave bread it gets harder that the Rock of Gibraltar and please don't do that???? Whew! Vent finished! But seriously, am I wrong here? Mommy in my book doesn't equal Maid!

Two Girls, Two Fish, a Bean and a Beagle

Two girls, Two Fish, a Bean and a Beagle.

Our lives are so full and so busy. For moms there is just so much responsibility whether you work or stay home. For me, sometimes it makes me want to hide under the covers with my fingers plugging my ears, while singing “La, La, La, La laaaaaaaaaa”.

Between learning to read, and doing mission projects, my girls are always needing me. I knew this going in as a parent, and for the most part I truly enjoy it. But there are times, when I feel I need me time. I mean I am so good at “me time” that I must have it perfected; maybe I should copyright my “me time” experiences. LOL

I am a great pedicure seeker outer. Want a good Pedi in our area? I can tell you where to go. Need a good coffee break, I know the place! Best place to scrapbook (other than my own scrapbook room, because my girls can find me there?) I got your number!

So why? Why? Do I not take advantage of these places, and these opportunities more often? Guilt. I feel bad leaving my two girls, two fish, hubby and a beagle (Bean is rather attached or embedded at the moment so he travels with me everywhere, no escaping Bean!). What if they need me? I mean every time I go (which mind you is rarely other than my two bunco nights a month) it is like I am committing a crime! The girls give off such guilt, as though I am abandoning them! What the heck?

So I decided to sit down with the ring leader, Elise. I had to explain to her that Daddy (Colin) wants his Elli and Emma time. Colin loves our girls; to be honest I think he hopes Bean will be a Beana, because he loves being the guy in their life. They love him too, they cannot wait for Daddy, but I honestly think Elise is trying for this power trip. Well Mama is bigger, and she ain’t falling for that.

So when I ask what her deal is? Why she doesn’t want me to go? What does she say? “Well, the thing is, if you go and I stay, then I am not going and you are going, but I am staying.” Huh? That is basically all I can get out, because I am still trying to untangle that sentence in my head. Try again I tell her. “Well, I am afraid you will get into a car accident, die, and I will never see you again.” Hmmm… Good one, but I am sensing some intentional guilt coupled with a ton of BS. “Yeah, I say, so the real reason is?”
She huffs, “Fine, I just don’t think it is fair that you get to get pedicures and go with your friends why I don’t get to.” Ahhh… The truth…

Ohhhh dear Elise. “Well my dear,” I say through gritted teeth and a faux smile, as I know realize I have been played for years by this too smart for her britches kind of girl, “When you are the mommy, you will be able to do the same.” “Well, that won’t happen because I won’t be a mommy, because you said it hurts!”. Humph! Realizing that this conversation is going no where, I kiss her on her forehead, which is a lot nicer than I want to be! Then I say, “Well I will see you all later after I hit Starbucks for my frappuccino fix, get my mani/pedi, the go the scrapbook heaven store, to peruse the aisles on no schedule!”

The Moral of the story? Mom’s need our own time! We do we deserve it and we need it to maintain the sanity and give us more patience, especially when we go through all the effort to build missions for these lovely child wonders! Right? So now I no longer feel guilty about leaving my 2 girls 2 fish and a beagle. I relish my time away, as I know it will refresh me for my time back in the trenches. I love being a mom, but I can’t forget who I was before I was a mom, because I am going to need her when the children are grown and no longer need Calista the Mom.

I'mmmmm Baaaaaacccckkk! And I have a Funny!

Sorry for the ridiculously long hiatus of 3.5 days! I am here I swear! But apparently this pregnancy is kicking my tookas! I was so tired, that even checking my emails seemed like a daunting task, and for this email obsessed mama, that is saying a lot!!! So check out the next post! I'mmmm baaaaack!!!!!

Frugal Tip of the Day Buy Only What You Need!

So I was watching an episode of Wife Swap, and there was this family that had it's basement nearly entirely cluttered by extras of items that were on sale. Extra Soaps, extra shampoos, canned food, you name it! Now I am all for being prepared, but there comes a time when it is too much, and just because you have a coupon doesnt mean you need to spend the money because you want to have it stocked. Reevaluate your stockpile items do you really need to add to it? Are you going to need to rent a storage shed to hold it all? Maybe you should hold off then. Everyone should have a little extra, but we should all try to know when enough is enough.

Mission Discriminated!

So Elise comes home completely bummed. Apparently because the classroom cannot house 25 missions, they decided to have the class vote on which missions should stay for open house. I thought that was a little harsh being that all the kids worked so hard, and now they are being told that some are better than others. I thought they should have picked names out of a hat in fairness, however that is neither here nor there! Why? Because Elise's which caused quite a stir (and rightly so darn it!) was disqualified because it was perishable. So now this perishable parish, cannot even get it's moment in the spot light! Not only that but Mrs. C, never said anything about this vote or the open house when I asked about the krispies!!! Grrrrr!!!!

I told Elise, that the point is, it was loved by all and even though it will be trashed (what the heck else can I do with it???) it was a wonderful (gag!) experience! All the family stress..... errr Bonding, Family Bonding, was such a joy! Really, I do not think I will ever forget this experience (as it is now seered into my brain) and it's creative outlet.

So.... Don't make perishable Parishes for class, it won't be able to stay for open house! Bummer!

Mission Accomplished!!!!

Let’s just get this mission breakdown out of the way:

6 small boxes of Rice Krispy Cereal (since the freaking store didn’t have the large ones: $11.34
6 bags of marshmallows (the minis because aren’t they so cute???) $6.00
1 pound of butter: $2.49 (and yes it was the good kind!)
11 rolls of Chocolate Necco Wafers (I gag at the thought) $9.79
2 Hershey Candy Bars (for Doors and Windows): $1.78
Meringue Powder for the Royal Freaking Icing: $5.49
Powdered Sugar for the Royal Freaking Icing: $1.00
Cookies for the sandy soil: $2.49
Floral Foam for Room and Bell Tower: $27.13
Paint and Glue because to hell with the Royal Freaking Icing : $4.99
Emotional Suffering and Misery: Immeasurable and therefore cannot be added to the calculations.

Mission Quantitative Total: $72.44

Yup that is right $72.44 for a freaking mission project when I could have paid $20 or less with a coupon had I known about the kits in time! OMG I will never make a mission like this again. My sanity is gone, my hair is thin, and my patience, err… well I never really had any patience but that is besides the point!

The Leaning Tower of Krispy was replaced by a Tower of Foam and graham crackers, which I will report fell promptly down with one turn of the car. IT had to be stacked in a shabby kind of way to even have some semblance of a tower.

To be honest I was ready to drop kick that dang thing into the classroom, dust off my hands, turn on my heels and scream with glee. Ding Dong, the Missions dead, La La La (sorry please excuse the horrible rendition from the Wizard of Oz.)

Anyway, Elise was thrilled to take her project in, the kids were in love with the fact that it was candy and krispy’s even though they were no longer edible. So do I get my mom of the year award yet? I mean come on! If there as any reason to go postal this project was it! Next time I am going to buy the mission 3 months ahead, set it up and call it a day, I may even hire someone to put it together for us!!! Ha! Take that 4th grade!

Sorry for the quick and lame update, but I am so tired, my eyelids feel like they are huge pillows, and speaking of pillows, I need to go get mine! After last night of staying up with my engorged beagle from over consumption of stolen pet food, Rosie has been left with a sour tummy and an equally sour disposition. Note to self: Place doggie food in a container that sneaky stealth beagles cannot get into. Well I am off. Over and out! Nap Time ya’ll!

Mission Accomplished...

Yes... the mission is accomplished. And due to the morning sickness, and treating a beagle who opened up the cabinet and gorged on her food, she is now a moaning mess much like I myself am. I promise to finish up the Mission Trilogy by this afternoon...

Mission Pics (Thus Far)

Mission Front

(Note the Leaning Tower of Krispy)

Mission Side

(Note the crumbled cookies for the sandy soil, inventive right?)

4th Grade Mission Projects: Not For The Faint Of Heart, Part 2

Truss Building and Royal Icing Mortar Combat… It wasn’t easy, and it wasn’t pretty. I am still emotional from this traumatic experience, but I will try to relay last night’s events, that left me sticky, exhausted, and frustrated. Honestly, if I never see a stick pretzel again, it will be too soon.

It was about 2:45pm when we returned from school, and I decided to “ice down”, our mission mock up. When we returned home the first thing I see is that the Bell Tower had taken a tumble. I quick scoop it up and smoosh it back together before Elise sees it and has a breakdown. I made my Royal Icing (yes I like to capitalize it because it is so official sounding, isn’t it?) with meringue powder (again channeling my inner Martha), in my Kitchen Aid Mixer. Feeling very competent I put the icing in my piping bag with the string end thingy (ok maybe that isn’t the official name of the tip thing, but work with me!). I twist the end of the bag, and set off to work.

Elise holds up the krispy blocks and I begin to pipe underneath them. All of a sudden, my piping bad springs a leak, and not this little drip thing, but I mean a gusher, before I know it, the bag bursts, and my not so Royal Icing, is all over me, the blocks and the wood floor. I can feel my blood pressure rise, as I cannot stand messes, and just the mere fact that this kitchen has been taken over by this mission is difficult enough, but now I have icing all over. I count to ten and begin to clean up. With every sweep of the sponge the icing grows, and moves about, as though running from my sponge. After about 20 minutes, I finally get it cleaned up.

I count to ten again and I get another bag out, and clean off the tip of the string thingy and start all over again. I try smiling and telling Elise that this will all be over soon and that she is doing such a great job and is going to have the most unique mission (really what I couldn’t get out of my head was the Seinfeld episode where Jerry and Elaine see the ugly baby and call it special!) So I just keep smiling, and Elise not fooled, looks at me in skepticism. “No really,” I tell her, “It will be great!” I can tell, she isn’t buying it.

Finally the mission is glued down with that freaking icing. Next is on to the truss building that Colin swore would be the way to go. One after one of the stick pretzels break and disintegrate. I try to keep my blood pressure down so Bean won’t think his Mama is a Freaking Mimi, but holy guacamole, this mission will never end.

I call Colin, in absolute desperation and lack of patience. “Oh, so the pretzel trusses are not working. Now what?” Colin says, “Well I told you we needed to get the thicker pretzels” OMG Oh! No he di’nt!” (Well maybe he did, but that is beside the point! Sheesh!) “Well, dear dear Colin, “ I turn and whisper scream into the phone, “the last time, I constructed a model, was say, never, so when you get home dear lovely man, figure it out! This engineer is walking off the job!” I turn back around and smile at Elise, and say “Daddy, will be home soon sweetheart, and he has a plan!” Again with the skeptical look, what is with that kid? LOL

So Colin arrives home on his white horse, and announces that we need to go to the craft store because we will just get Styrofoam to fix this roof. What a novel idea, especially since the aforementioned kits are made out of foam! Why didn’t I go with that????? So off we go to the craft store, he finds the foam, and when we get home, he fashions roof tops, with a very thrilled Elise. Meanwhile, I am again, watching Judge Judy, and feeling my blood pressure decrease as she reams the morons who are before her.

Colin and Elise come back in from making the rooftops, and now it is my turn again. I make that dang icing and put it in the bag and we begin affixing the necco wafers for tiles, I with the icing, and Elise with the wafers. We get the lower building finished when we realize that the hunt will be on again, for more of the chocolate necco wafers as we have run out!!! So yet again we cannot finish the construction of this never ending, and patience defying project. So my kitchen is yet again commandeered by this Mission and the AWOL krispies I find everywhere! Not to mention that this morning… the Leaning Bell Tower of Krispies fell again…

To Be Continued: The Completion of the Mission, and the razing of the Leaning Bell Tower of Krispy.